


You look like someone I used to love.

by Look_Alive_Sunshine



Category: Danger Days: The True Lives of the Fabulous Killjoys - My Chemical Romance (Album), My Chemical Romance
Genre: Amnesia, Angst with a Happy Ending, Danger Days Era, Fluff and Angst, Frank Iero Is A Sweetheart, Gerard Way is a Sweetheart, How Do I Tag, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, One character thinks the other is dead but they aren’t really?, Temporary Amnesia
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-28
Updated: 2020-01-28
Packaged: 2021-02-27 10:40:21
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 9,972
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22455877
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Look_Alive_Sunshine/pseuds/Look_Alive_Sunshine
Summary: It was just another day at Battery City, but then he walked in.It was the beginning of the end of sorts, but frank didn’t know that yet.(Or the one where Frank is just your average citizen in Battery City, until the day Gerard walks into his office, and he starts to remember what things were like before the world ended.)
Relationships: Frank Iero/Gerard Way, Mikey Way/Pete Wentz
Comments: 4
Kudos: 48





	You look like someone I used to love.

Something was missing. 

Something was always missing. Frank didn’t know what it was, or why he thought that, but he knew that something was missing. 

But how can something be missing? He wondered. He’d been in this place for as long as he could remember, the clinical white walls surrounding him, and clouding his memories. 

The thing that had always bothered him was the children. There was something wrong with the children. He could never pinpoint what it was, but he was sure that there was something so very wrong with the children. 

He had no idea why he thought that. 

They all act the same, each going about their day, wake up, school, home etc. All the same tasks everyday, with the same expressions on their faces. They act the same as everyone else, and so he wondered how could anything be wrong. 

He was sure he acted the same way as a child. 

He would be even more sure though if he could actually remember his childhood. 

He didn’t remember much. Just adulthood. But he guessed that’s what seeing the same scenery, and doing the same things every day did to you. 

Every day is just the same cycle. Wake up, take your pills, have breakfast, go to work, have lunch, take your pills, go home, have dinner, take your pills, listen to the news, get into bed, take pills, sleep. Over and over again. 

But something was so so wrong, and he hadn’t a clue what it was. Maybe he needed to speak to someone and ask about getting a higher dosage of pills, to see if that helped him. 

He made a mental note to do that on his way back from work. In the meantime, he continued to work on his small grey computer. Inputting details from the sheets that were handed out to him. 

Everyone did the same thing, but that’s just how things worked at BL/ind. There was nothing unusual about it, this is normal for them, which was why Frank was alarmed at how unsettled he was here. 

He wanted to do something else. Do anything else. Anything but sit here and do this. 

That settled it, he really needed to speak to someone about the pills. He wasn’t meant to be having thoughts like this, these thoughts are bad. 

He counted down the minutes until he could go home. But home wasn’t really the right word. He wasn’t even sure what the word home meant, but it sure as hell wasn't the place he lived in. 

The place he lived was just like any other apartment in Battery City, in fact, it was exactly the same. Home definitely wasn’t the right word. What he had was four walls and an empty husk. 

He was glad that work ended then, as he wasn’t sure how much longer he could stay without taking pills. Surely he would go mad. 

He stopped off on his way back from work.

‘Please state your name and intention’ the robotic voice said. 

“Frank Iero, I’m here to request a higher dosage of pills” Frank replied, In almost the same robotic voice. 

“Processing request. Please wait while we bring this up with higher management.”

And Frank waited, just like he had been instructed to do, because that’s what you did here. You followed the instructions given to you. If you didn’t, well… Frank wasn’t too sure what would happen if you didn’t, but he assumed that you’d be left outside Battery City in the wastelands. 

There had been many stories about the wasteland, but all he knew for certain was that they were abandoned, toxic, and that no one survived out there. 

“Your dosage has been upped to 3 pills. Have a nice day, and remember, the aftermath is secondary” the robotic voice said, before some pills came down a Chute. 

Frank grabbed the pills and took them as soon as he got home, before eating and going to sleep, his mind once again becoming background noise. 

. . . . .

For a while, everything was ok. Frank wasn’t plagued by any intrusive thoughts, and his emotions were kept in check. The sense that something was missing was gone and he was back to being just another citizen of Battery City. 

That was until the week after, when he went into work expecting it to all be ok, not knowing how wrong he was. 

The majority of the day was ok, and up until the last hour or two, Frank was at peace. 

But that’s when he walked in. 

It was a beginning of sorts. But frank didn’t know that yet. 

The boy who walked in should have been just like any other person working for BL/ind who came to give him some more paperwork, but something about him was different, and Frank could tell this from the moment the door opened announcing this boy’s presence. 

He had shaggy black hair that fell to his shoulders, and his fingers twitched nervously over the paper, but that wasn’t what interested Frank. 

No, what interested Frank was his eyes. 

His eyes seemed so alive, and so full and bright. And there was something so so familiar about them. It was as if he’d seen these eyes before, seen this person before, but surely that was impossible. Surely he would remember something so full of life. 

This boy was the most alive thing Frank had ever seen. 

And he wanted more. 

He realised the boy was holding out the papers to him, and that he must have been staring like an idiot. He quickly took the papers before turning around to face the computer, expecting the boy to leave. 

But that was just the problem. The boy didn’t leave and instead stood there before speaking. 

“Frank Iero, right?” The boy asked, unsure. 

“Yes, why?” Frank said, trying to remain devoid of emotion, but he could feel the pills starting to wear off. 

“I just… do I know you?” He said, before continuing with “I’m Gerard Way”

Something about that name caused his insides to twist and pull, and he felt the need to scream or cry. 

He definitely needed more pills. 

“I… I don’t believe so…. I’m sorry…” he said. Unsure of what he was apologising for. 

“Oh it’s no problem… I was just sure, no I was certain that I’d seen you somewhere before, and your name seemed so familiar…”

“Well, I did get employee of the month a few months ago? Maybe you heard or saw that?” Frank said, knowing full well in his heart that this wasn’t the reason. 

He didn’t know what the reason was but he sure knew it wasn’t this. 

“That’s probably the reason. Sorry for intruding. I will get going now” Gerard said, before walking out of Franks office. 

Frank shook his head and tried to focus on his work, but that didn’t stop his heart beating faster. It also didn’t stop the sense of what he could only assume was sadness. It crushed him like he was a delicate piece of glass. 

But he had no idea why. 

He took the emergency pills out his pocket and swallowed them, feeling instantly better. The crushing feeling lessening, and his heart slowing down. 

He’d be alright. He thought, before continuing to work. 

. . . . .

It went on like this for the next few weeks. Frank was fine, just the same old citizen as everyone else. But then Gerard would walk in. Sometimes he’d say something. Other times he wouldn’t. Either way, it sent his heart pounding, and his breath stalling, and each time it was accompanied by a crushing sadness. 

Gerard would then hand him the papers and leave, and Frank would take his pills and finally be able to focus once more on the work in front of him. 

But then one day it was all too much. 

Gerard walked in, but this time he greeted him with a ‘hello Frankie” and that’s what sent him over the edge. 

It was the word Frankie, he thinks. 

One moment he was ok, the next, water was pouring down his cheeks and the sense of missing something was back, but this time stronger than ever. 

He didn’t know what to do, but apparently Gerard did. He crouched down next to him before enveloping him in a hug. 

“Wh...what’s.. H..Happening… to…. me?” He asked between sobs. 

“Hush, it’s ok. It’s all ok Frankie.” He said, rocking Frank gently in his arms. 

Frank clutched onto him tighter. A fresh stream of tears falling from his eyes. 

“It’s ok Frankie. You’re crying, that’s all.” 

“But..b.but I’m not… su..supposed to cry?!” He exclaimed frantically. 

“Oh but you are. Everyone is. It’s these pills that stop it”

“Wha ...what do you mean?” Frank asked, the tears finally slowing down. 

“I mean it’s all a lie Frankie. Please tell me you remember me?”

“Of course I do.. you’re Gerard. Who comes here every day with the papers I need.”

“You don't remember me do you?” 

“What do you mean? Why am I crying Gee?” His voice getting increasing frantic. 

“I don’t think you remember. But I think your heart does.”

“Gerard what do you mean!” He said hysterically. 

“I’m sorry Frankie. It’s too dangerous for you to remember. Just take the pills. I’ll leave now. I’ll stop distracting you” he said, before letting go of Frank and turning to leave the room. 

“Gerard wait!” Frank cried. And Gerard paused. 

“You’ll come back right? Come back tomorrow? Please Gerard I need you. I don’t know why but I really need you. You feel so alive and it kills me, because I know I want more. But I shouldn’t. Because this isn’t how it’s supposed to be. I’m not meant to feel. I’m not meant to want!” He paused for a second before continuing “And I’m very very scared, and being scared scares me even more because I’m NOT MEANT TO FEEL! I’ve never felt before. What am I doing? What’s going on Gerard, tell me. Who are you!!?”

“You need to calm down a bit. Take the pills and get back to work. If I’m not back tomorrow I’ll be back the day after, ok?” He said, before turning and walking out of the room, leaving Frank in a stunned silence. 

Frank picked himself up off the floor, and with shaking hands, forced himself to take the pills. 

The shaking stopped, the tears dried, and he went back to work. 

But the sense that something was missing still lingered in the back of his mind. 

He tried his best to ignore it. 

. . . . .

Gerard didn’t return the next day. Or the day after for that matter, and Frank was starting to think he had lied. 

He was also starting to wonder whether he had hallucinated Gerard, and that he was never real in the first place. 

Maybe he was going mad. Or maybe he was just lonely. 

He knew that the citizens here weren’t supposed to feel lonely, and decided to up his dosage without telling anyone, because if he told someone surely they would get suspicious. 

With that thought he swallowed four pills. 

He still felt lonely. 

. . . . .

It was just another day in Battery City when it happened. He should have expected it would happen sooner or later though. 

He had run out of pills. 

He wasn’t due any more until a few days, but because he had been taking more than the prescribed amount, he found himself staring at an empty bottle of pills. 

He guessed that he could always go and ask for more, but he wouldn’t want the people getting suspicious about why he had taken so many. 

What if they threw him out into the wasteland? What would he do then?

He tried to call himself down, telling himself that it would be ok, he just had to wait until a few days had passed, and then he could always ask for a higher dosage. 

He’d be fine for a few days. 

At least that’s what he told himself on his way to work. 

Everything was pretty normal, apart from the sense of missing something being amplified by a hundred. He also felt so sad and alone. 

But that was about it. 

It was the second day when things got worse. For starters. He woke up feeling angry. His whole body was brimming with rage. 

He tried to shake it off but it just got worse and worse throughout the day. 

He finally snapped when the door to his office opened. 

He hoped meekly that it would be Gerard, but he knew it wouldn’t. 

His thoughts were only confirmed when a boy he hadn’t ever seen before walked in. 

“Papers” he said, handing over a few sheets. 

And Frank lost it. 

“WHO THE HELL EVEN ARE YOU? WHO THE HELL EVEN AM I? WHERE DID GERARD GO. HE SAID HE'D COME BACK BUT HE DIDN'T. CAN'T YOU SEE? SOMETHING IS MISSING BUT NO ONE KNOWS WHAT.  
JUST LOOK AROUND YOU. WHAT IS IT THAT'S MISSING. IT'S LIKE I'M LOOKING BUT NEVER ACTUALLY SEEING AND IT MAKES ME SO ANGRY!”

The boy stood dumbfounded for a second, before saying, “Have you had your pills? I think it would be a good idea if you do.”

“TO HELL WITH THE PILLS. THE PILLS ARE WHAT BLINDS YOU. FUCK THE PILLS. FUCK THIS. I'M OUT” Frank yelled, before getting up and turning to leave. 

“Sir you can’t leave until your shifts over”

“DOES IT LOOK LIKE I CARE?” He snapped. 

“Sir, I'm going to have to contact higher management about this”

Frank didn’t care. Instead he gave the boy the most loathing, spiteful look he could muster, before turning and leaving. 

He felt better. It felt nice shouting. Like there was finally noise. He wanted to keep shouting, just to hear it, just to hear something other than the generic ways people talk, and the hustle of cars. 

The streets were quiet, deserted even, and Frank knew that this was because everyone was still at work. He had never seen the streets like this, but that was probably because he never left before he was supposed to. 

He reached his apartment, slammed the door as hard as he could just to hear something different, before sinking down onto the floor. 

His head was a mess. It was so loud and busy. He didn’t know what was happening. 

He was crying again, but it felt good. 

It felt good to feel, to feel anger coursing through his veins, to feel sadness and fatigue behind his eyes. 

He wanted to do something, and he wanted to do something now. 

He moved in what seemed like slow motion to the glass window. He pulled his fist back and punched, shattering the glass and watching it rain down onto the street below. 

He felt pain shooting through his hand, and saw bits of glass sticking out his knuckles. He saw this and laughed maniacally, because he could finally feel again. before pulling the splinters of glass out. 

The pain felt good. It meant he was alive. Really and truly alive, and not in the dream like state he’d been living in for god knows how long. 

The next thing he noticed was red. 

His hand was bleeding red onto the grey tiled floor, it was so beautiful compared to the grey and white monochrome background he had been so used to. 

It also reminded him of something else. It reminded him of hair, bright red alive hair, and the smell of coffee. It reminded him of kisses under falling rain and filled him with emotions of love, sadness and longing. 

Even though his memories provided him with no face, he knew who the hair once belonged to. It belonged to Gerard, and he remembered that now. 

He loved Gerard. He loved him more than life itself. 

He was so caught up in his thoughts that he must have missed his door opening, and people walking in. 

“Someone told me you haven’t been taking your pills.” A voice said, and Frank was too filled with fear to turn around to face the voice. 

“I.. I ran out, and didn’t want to disturb anyone by asking for more. I was going to collect some tomorrow” he said. Half of it was the truth, but he had no intention of getting any more the next day. 

“I see. Well you’ll be glad to know that we have upped your dosage and we’ll be making sure you take them. If you ever run out again, feel free to come and ask. We won’t mind. It’s important that every citizen in Battery City lives a perfect life”

Frank scoffed. A perfect life? Really? How was this in any way perfect now that he knew what Love was. Life would be perfect if he could spend it with Gerard. Life would be perfect if there was colour, and sound, and emotion. 

This wasn’t perfect. Hell, did this even really qualify as life anymore? A life filled with numbness and schedules. Having everyone else dictate what you do. 

“Now take these pills and we’ll catch up with you in a few hours to make sure you take your next dose,” he said, holding is palm out. His palm that contained 5 pills. 

Frank took them reluctantly. His whole body shaking. Was he really ready to give up what he had just found? But the look on the mans face told him that he didn’t really have a choice. 

“Can I ask you a question before I take them?” He said. 

“Go ahead”

“What happened to Gerard. He was a boy who gave me papers at work. He had black hair that fell to his shoulders? That’s my question, what happened to Gerard Way?”

A look of confusion passed this mans face, before he replied. “He stopped taking his pills on purpose and was planning an act of rebellion against BL/ind. We had no other choice but to throw him out into the wastelands” 

Time seemed to stop. Gerard had been thrown to the wastelands, and that only meant one thing in Franks mind; death. 

Wave after wave of crushing sadness courses through him, and for the first time that day he was glad he had the pills in his hand. They would stop this. They would make him numb again, and that’s all he wanted at that point. 

He took the pills and everything went dark. 

. . . . .

He woke up to see the white ceiling above his head. He wasn’t sure how long he had been asleep for, but judging by how stiff his body felt, he guessed it had been a few days. 

He sat up and looked around. Everything was just as it should be. 

He got out of bed, wondering why he had been asleep for so long. He should probably explain to his boss that he had fallen asleep. 

He went to the bathroom to change into his work clothes, before making breakfast. His eyes were drawn to the kitchen window. There was something unusual about it. His mind told him that it should be broken, but he didn’t know why. It had never been broken had it? So why did he think this?

He sighed before setting the plate in the sink and taking his dosage of pills, feeling instantly better. 

The next few weeks passed uneventfully. 

It was the same old thing, every day. He woke up and followed his schedule. But he could shake the feeling that he was forgetting something very important. 

He felt like that a lot recently. It started off with small things, like glancing at the kitchen window a second too long, or looking down at his hand, expecting to be injured. 

It got worse however. He started doing things like expecting the person giving him papers to be someone he knew. Someone who’s name escaped him. The smell of coffee reminded him of something. He wasn’t sure what but it was something. 

And occasionally he would get this feeling of deep and utter despair in the pit of his stomach. 

At times like this he took 6 pills instead of 5. 

Thoughts of the wasteland upset him too. He told himself that it was because he had been brought up to believe the wasteland was bad, and so the feeling of upset was probably just his mind telling him to fear it. 

But deep down, a part of him knew this wasn’t the reason. 

He found himself feeling worse and worse each day, and had started taking 7 pills at a time. 

They worked for a little while, but soon they wore off and he was left feeling utterly hopeless. 

With each passing day Frank found himself taking more and more pills, wanting to feel numb again, just like everyone else in this godforsaken facility. 

All he wanted was to feel numb again. Was that too much to ask?

. . . . .

He had been taking 10 pills at a time when it happened. 

His mind had been spinning and he was itching for his next dosage, and so decided to go straight to the office to ask if he could have some pills. 

But while he was walking something caught his eye. 

There was a poster. 

A poster with a face and the word ‘W A N T E D’. He stepped closer to the poster, his eyes scanning the boy, but he couldn’t shake the feeling that he knew this boy. 

The boy made him feel so sad. And so very alone. The boy seemed to be wearing a mask that covered his face, and his hair. It wasn’t meant to be black like the poster said. No his hair should have been something else. 

Even though it was simply a poster on a wall the boy seemed to radiate nothing but life. 

He looked around the picture, his eyes searching for a name. A name to put with the face. A face that felt so familiar to him, but he didn’t know why. 

The only allusion to a name was the word ‘Party Poison’ written at the top, followed by a pill and a cross underneath it. 

With that he decided that maybe he would stop taking the pills. After all, isn’t that what this ‘Party Poison’ was telling him. And for some unknown reason he trusted this boy, he trusted him more than he trusted BL/ind, which was strange, because he was sure he hadn’t even seen this boy before, and yet, he couldn’t shake the feeling that he had. 

He went back to work, and when he got back to the apartment he took only 9 pills instead of 10. 

. . . . . 

A few weeks later he was down to taking only one pill a day, and even that was just for show. 

The pills no longer had an effect on him, but he had learnt to control his thoughts better. It was hard at first, and he would find himself wanting to lash out, but still, he didn’t. 

He still wasn’t sure who this boy was, but at least he could think clearer. 

One day he would figure it out. 

. . . . . 

It was a Monday evening when he figured it out. To anyone else this Monday would have been but another day that had passed uneventfully. But to Frank, it was the day everything made sense. 

More and more posters had started to pop up, with different names on it. But there seemed to be 3 main ones, that called themselves the ‘fabulous killjoys’. It consisted of someone with big hair, who called himself Jet star, another who went by Kobra Kid, and then there was Party Poison. 

It was a child that did it. It seemed so fitting that a child would be the one who gave him the answers, considering they were what put him at unease in the first place.

He was standing in the hallway, looking at Party Poison, wondering what it was about him that seemed so familiar, when a small girl ran up to him. 

This was unusual, because children never ran. Not round here anyway. 

“Are you ok mister?” She asked. “I’ve seen you looking at Gerard a lot recently”

He looked at her, bewildered. “What did you just call him?” He asked. 

She blinked once, before saying. “His names Gerard. He used to cheer me up. Was I not supposed to say that? Mommy always says I do things I shouldn’t do, and then she tries to give me more pills” she grimaced at the word before continuing. “I always spit them out when she isn’t looking. Gerard always told me they were bad. You won’t tell her I spit them out will you!?” She said, visibly concerned. 

“Of.. of course not. But don’t you think you should get back to your mommy? She is probably wondering where you are” 

“Oh yes good idea. Goodbye!” She said, waving before jogging back down the corridor. 

“Gerard….” he said, wondering why that name brought back so much pain. Before he suddenly remembered. 

He remembered red hair, and tired whispers of ‘I love you’ in the dark. He remembered kisses at sunrise, and coffee and rain. He remembered promises, one especially stuck out in his mind. ‘I’ll never forget you’ 

But he’d broken that promise hadn’t he? He remembered the same Gerard coming into his office with papers in his hands, he remembered a shattered window and blood pooling on the floor. 

He remembered his childhood, the pasta his mother used to serve him. 

He now knew why the children had always bothered him. They shouldn’t be like this, children should be full of life, and colour, and imagination. And although everyone in Battery City was alive, was anyone ever truly living? 

He finally knew what was missing. What was missing was colour, sound, emotion, pain, imagination. 

He remembered news about Gerard being in the wastelands, and was struck with sadness, before realising that he was still alive. 

He was still alive and his name was now Party Poison. 

With that, Frank started to formulate a plan to escape, because he’d so much rather die than live a life where no one really lived. He’d rather die than stay here, and so, even if he died out in the wastelands, he came to the conclusion that it would be so much better than staying here. 

He’d finally found the missing piece, and there was no way he was letting it go. 

And with that, he took off at a sprint back to his apartment. 

. . . . .

It took him a few days to finally come up with a plan, but finally he had one. 

He would take his bag, filled with food and water, and head towards the outskirts of the city. There, he would find a pipe down into the sewers. He could follow along the sewers until he came up at the very edge of the city, which he knew would have dracs surrounding it. 

He would wait until the dracs shift finished, and while he was inside changing shifts with the next person, Frank would make a mad dash out, where he knew he would find a beaten trans am. He would then get in it and drive away, hopefully finding somebody who knew of the killjoys whereabouts. 

He knew that in order to pull this off he would need to get up early, so that no one would be suspicious as to why he hadn’t turned up for work. 

With that thought, he waited for 1am to come. 

. . . . . 

The first part of the plan went smoothly. He had managed to make it to the sewers and had got out by the exit of the city. That's when everything went wrong.

He had waited until the drac was walking inside and made a run for it, however what he hadn't expected was for the drac to hear him, and turn around.

Adrenaline kicked in and he ran even faster, knowing that if he managed to make it into the Trans-Am he would be safe. 

The drac had started to shoot at him now, and ray blasts surrounded him. This had caused a commotion and had gathered the attention of other dracs that were guarding the perimeter of the city, and they had also started to shoot at him as well. 

He ran faster, his heart pounding against his chest, wondering if he would actually manage to make it out alive.

He supposed it wouldn’t be that much of a disappointment if he died. Sure he’d be disappointed that he never got to see Gerard again, but it’s not like anyone else would care. He’d get replaced at his job, his apartment would go to someone else without anyone even giving it a second thought. 

They didn’t care about things like that as much as they used to. Back in the olden days, If someone died they would be thrown a funeral in honour of their memory. But not here. Here you would just be replaced, used at their disposal like a pawn in a chess game. 

A ray blast flew dangerously close to his cheek as he got closer to the vehicle. 

Suddenly they stopped. 

Frank knew this probably meant something bad, but instead of standing around waiting, he used this to his advantage and scrambled into the trans am. 

He turned the ignition key and by some small Miracle he heard the engine start up. 

He looked back just to see that there were now about 10 draculoids, and a bald man. The bald man was grinning at him, waving slowly, as if to taunt and mock him. 

He probably thought Frank wouldn’t stand a chance out in the wastelands. 

Frank was determined to prove him wrong. 

With that he stepped on the gas and sped away into the desert. 

. . . . .

Frank had severely underestimated how big the zones were. 

He’d been out there a couple of weeks and he was very lost. 

He had no idea where to begin to find Gerard. 

He had been staying at an old run down diner with another zonerunner who went by Storm Singer. She looked young, around 18 maybe? And had short Bright blue hair with a fringe covering one side of her face. 

She also had what appeared to be some form of dog or wolf, however half of it had been replaced with robotic parts. She told him it’s name was Dusty. 

Storm was good with mechanics, Frank had learnt that much. 

He owed a lot to her, she showed him the ropes of the zones. She told him that they were no longer referred to as the wastelands. She also helped him come up with a name for himself, as she said that he could no longer go around calling himself Frank, and so they had decided on a name. 

Frank now went by Fun Ghoul. It was pretty rad in his opinion. 

The Diner was relatively small, but it was fine, considering Frank spent most of his days out searching for Gerard. Storm never asked where he went during the day, and as long as he brought back some supplies she was willing to keep it that way. The diner contained a front room with a few stools and an old bar, as well as a back room. Storm slept in the back room, with Dusty at her feet. 

Sometimes, he woke up in the dead of night to hear crying coming from the back room. 

He told himself he’d ask her one day. But it took him a while. He didn’t want to invade her privacy. She never invaded his, and she had done so much for him and he didn’t want her to think he was ungrateful for what she’d done. 

It was around the two week mark when he finally plucked up the courage to ask her. 

She was sat down on one of the stools, a cup of water in hand, gazing seemingly into nothing when Frank sat down next to her. 

It took her a moment to notice before she said “hey ghoul” in a voice that sounded sad. 

“Storm, I wanted to ask you something, but don’t feel like you have to answer, it may be a bit personal, but I just want to know and make sure you’re alright.” He said, awaiting a reply. 

“It’s alright Ghoul, you can ask” 

“What I wanted to say is, sometimes I wake up at night, and I hear you crying. I don’t mean to eavesdrop on you, but I’m worried, and I want to make sure you’re ok. “

It took her a moment, before she finally replied. “I had a friend. We grew up together, we escaped Battery city together, me and her. She went by Haru Nature. She claimed it was after an old KPop band she listened to. You know, before all this,” she paused to gesture around her. “I dyed her hair for her, we dyed it with streaks of different colours. It suited her.” She paused, smiling up at the ceiling as if reminiscing those old times. 

“But then one day the Dracs found us. They shot her dead while I was inside, oblivious. I feel so bad, if I hadn’t been inside I could have saved her. Or at least shot the Drac that killed her” she sighed, still looking at the ceiling. “My only hope now is that the Phoenix witch is taking good care of her”

“You shouldn’t feel guilty about it. There was nothing you could have done. In reality, if you were out there as well, chances are, you’d have been shot dead too.” He said. 

“You’re right” She said, before pausing thoughtfully. “Say, considering I told you that, would you mind telling me where you go during the day? It’s just, you always leave, and each day you come back looking sadder and sadder.”

“I guess it’s only fair” he said, before continuing. “Long story short I’m looking for someone I used to love. I loved him long before all this, but it just took me a while to remember him. I saw a poster on the wall of the institute and knew he was alive, so each day, I go out there, searching for him.” He said. 

“What’s his name, I might have heard of him, I know a fair amount of Killjoys. People like to stop by for repairs. I’m like the mechanic here, ya know?” She joked. 

“I think he goes by Party Poison now.” He said. 

She sat there, dumbfounded. “You’re joking?!” She exclaimed.

“No, why?! Have you heard of him, do you know where he is!?” He asked. 

“Heard of him?! Everyone out here with half a brain cell has heard of him. He’s like our leader. Many of us idolise him. You know THE Party Poison?!” She said. 

“Err.. yeah?” He questioned. “Do you know where he is?” He asked. 

“No but I know some people that do.” She said, smiling. 

“Who?” 

“They go by Dr Death Defying and Show Pony.” She grinned. 

“When can we go?!” He asked, him voice getting hopeful. 

“We leave at dawn. Pack some food because it might take us a while.” She grinned at him. 

“You’re really going to help me?!” He exclaimed 

“Of course, I hate to see a sad face, oh and I also really want to meet him” she laughed. 

“Thank you” he said. 

“No problem. Now pack!” She said, before turning and leaving. 

. . . . .

It was still dark outside when he was awoken to a wet lick on the face. It took him a while to familiarise himself with the surroundings, before he realised he was in the diner with Storm Singer, and the thing licking his face was Dusty. 

“Look Alive sunshine. We’ve got a big day ahead of us” she said, before pulling him to his feet. 

It was evident by the bags under her eyes, that Storm hadn’t got much sleep that night. 

She hauled to bags full of supplies into the Trunk, before instructing Dusty to get in the back. She also tossed him a ray gun while saying the words Just in case. 

They took turns driving and sleeping. Occasionally they would stop to eat and drink, and also let Dusty stretch his legs. 

They passed the time by listening to Mad Gear and Missile Kid. 

They had run into some Dracs in zone 6 but they had made quick work of ghosting them, and apart from that encounter things had been running quite smoothly. 

The Trans-Am seemed to be running low on gas, so they decided to see if they could find some form of civilisation. 

Eventually they found another Diner, which seemed to be populated with a fair few people, each with wildly coloured hair. 

What appeared to be their leader was sitting on a beaten bike. They had brown hair with a red stripe running through it, and seemed the type to go to Mad Gear concerts. 

The person saw them and waved them over. Frank told Storm to wait in the car and guard it, while he went over to talk. 

Before he could even open his mouth to ask if they had any gas, the person went “Hey! I’m Chemical Cat, but you could call me Chem, or cat! Either is fine.” They paused. “What’s your name?”

“Err.. Hi Chem… I’m Fun Ghoul…” Frank said slowly. “I’m here with my friend, Storm. We were wondering if you had any gas we could trade for something” he said. 

“Well, that just depends on what you got to trade now doesn’t it?” 

“Err yeah I guess… we have water, and food, and storm there’s a good mechanic….?”

“She is? Wait really? Could she fix our radio for us? I’d give you some gas for that?”

“Err sure, i'll just go ask her…” he said, walking back to the car. 

Storm was sitting, looking slightly anxious. “Well! What did they say?” She asked. 

“If you could fix the radio then sure. We could have gas” 

“I’ll go speak to them now, you, stay here with Dusty.” She said, before jogging over to Chemical Cat. 

Frank sat in the Trans-Am while they spoke. Occasionally Dusty would let out a whine, and at times like these Frank would climb into the back to keep him company. 

He used to have a dog. He remembered that now. He didn’t know what happened to it but he assumed it must have died when the world ended. 

He was so lost in thought that he didn’t notice Storm getting closer until there was a knock on the window. 

He opened the door to talk to her. 

“So I’ve got some good news and some bad news. Which do you want first?” 

“Good news”

“Well the good news is that I’ve managed to get you a fair amount of gas. It should keep you going for a while”

“And the bad news?”

“The bad news is that that radio is going to take a couple of days to fix.” 

“Ok and?” 

“And, Dr D and Pony will probably be changing locations soon.”

“What are you implying…?” He asked. 

“I’m saying, I’ll stay here with Dusty and Chem, and you go off and find Poison. Chem said they’d give me a lift back to the diner once I’m done.”

“But how will I know where to go?”

“Just follow the coordinates, it’s not hard to miss” 

“So I’m guessing this is goodbye then Storm.” He said, sadly. 

“I guess it is”

“I’ll visit if I find him, you know? I won’t forget what you’ve done for me”

“You don’t have to lie to me Ghoul. I know you might not find the time to visit, but that’s ok. As long as you stay happy. Send me a note or something. Let me know if you find him?”

“I promise Storm. Take care of Dusty will you?”

“Of course. He is mine after all.” She joked. 

“Take care Storm.” 

“You too Frankie” she said. 

With that, Frank waved them off and drove closer to his destination. 

. . . . . 

It took him a few days and a few wrong turns before he finally managed to find Dr D and Party Poison. 

Having said that, he also found them completely by accident. 

He’d pretty much given up on directions, and at this point was just looking for some form of life to point him in the right direction. 

That’s when he came across a strangely structured building. 

He went up to the door and knocked. 

The person who answered the door was on roller blades, had polka dot leggings and a shirt that had the word NOISE printed on it. 

“Show Pony, you?” They asked. 

“Fun Ghoul, I’m here to speak to you and Dr D actually” He said. 

“Follow me.” They said, leading him inside before sitting him down at a table. They then went into another room and Frank said there, waiting for them to return. 

When they did return they were accompanied by a man who had messy black hair. 

“Doctor DeathDefying, how can I help?” He asked. 

“Hi, my name is Fun Ghoul, and I've heard you know where to find Party Poison.” He stated. 

“Maybe I do, what’s it to you”

“I need to find him.”

“Is there a reason behind this or do you just want the chance to meet the famous Party Poison?” 

“There’s a reason.”

“And that reason is…?”

“It’s a long story. I need to talk to him about something.” 

“Ok. Well I can’t give you an exact location as the fabulous killjoys are always moving from place to place, you know, to avoid the Dracs and things, but last I heard they were hanging out in Zone 7.” He said. 

“Thanks. Do you know what area?”

“No sorry. I think it’s on the outskirts but I can’t be sure.” 

“Ok.” He said, before turning to leave. 

“Want to crash here for the night, you look exhausted.” He said. 

“Really? That would be Shiny! Thanks!”

“Sure kiddo. No problem, I’ll get Show Pony to show you to the back room.”

Sure enough Show Pony came in a minute later and escorted him into the back room. In the back room there was another killjoy. She had dark brown hair, however the ends were dyed in greens and blues. 

It had taken Frank a while to get used to colour out here, because he was so used to the greys and whites of Battery City. But the more time he spent around it the more he got used to it and the more he remembered how life was like before all this. 

The more he remembered Gerard. 

From what Frank could gather, Gerard had a brother. A brother named Mikey. Frank was friends with Mikey, and had known him before he knew Gerard. 

Mikey had a boyfriend named Pete, and would spend more and more time with Pete each time Frank would come round. 

He believed it happened when Frank had walked in on Mikey and Pete making out, and so he had blindly stumbled into the bathroom to try and escape the sight that had been bestowed upon him. 

The only issue with that was that the bathroom was already occupied. 

By Gerard. 

In nothing but a towel. 

A quick but mortifying apology later, Frank had rushed out of the bathroom and down into the living room. Gerard followed soon after saying sorry for freaking out. 

After that their friendship grew. He found himself spending more and more time with Gerard rather than Mikey. (Who, let’s be honest, was too preoccupied with Pete to really pay them that much attention) 

They had gotten closer and closer over the years, and then one night, while it was storming outside, and they were both huddled together to try and keep warm, cups of coffee in hand, Gerard had turned to him and asked if Frank would consider going out with him. 

He of course had said yes, and well, you already know the rest. 

His chain of thought was broken by the girl from earlier, the one with dark brown hair dyed green and blue at the end. 

“Hey are you ok? You look very lost in thought.” She said. 

“Oh sorry, I was just thinking about someone.”

“Ooooh! Who?! Am I allowed to ask? I’m Lithium Lizard by the way, but you can call me Liz”

“Hey, well my name is Fun Ghoul. It’s kind of a long story, and also the reason I’m here”

“Well Ghoulie, I got time, so go on.” She grinned Mischievously. 

And so Frank did. He told her everything. From the pills, to Gerard, to remembering, and then forgetting. From the Poster on the wall, to the little girl who solved it all. He told her about escaping, and storm Singer, Dusty, and chemical cat. 

“And that’s how I ended up here, talking to you.” He finished. The sun had gone gone down a while ago, leaving them no light par a small battery powered lamp. 

“Well I hope you find him.” She said, smiling softly. 

“Thanks” he replied. 

“Well if I’m not here in the morning than it was nice meeting you Ghoulie.” She said. 

“Why wouldn’t you be here?” He asked. 

“I’m wandering. I wouldn’t say I’m lost, more just… searching. For something. I don’t know what but it’s something.” She smiled wistfully. 

“Well I hope you find whatever it is your looking for.” 

“Thanks. Well anyway. G’night Ghoul.”

“Night Liz” he said, before laying down and falling asleep. 

. . . . .

Sure enough, by the time he woke up, Liz was nowhere to be seen. 

He decided he would drive into zone 7, it was only about 2 zones away from here so it shouldn’t take that long. 

He went out into the front and saw Pony and Dr D sitting at a table. 

He cleared his throat to get their attention. 

“You heading off now Kiddo?” Dr D asked. 

“Yeah, I just wanted to say thanks for letting me crash here.”

“No problem. I hope you find him.” He said. 

“Thanks. I’ll see you round”

“See ya Ghoul” he said, before Frank turned and left. 

His Trans-Am was still in the same place he had left it the other day, and still had enough gas to last him for a few days. 

With that, he got in and drove off into the desert. 

. . . . .

He was starting to lose hope of ever finding Gerard. He had been travelling throughout zone seven for the last few days, and yet he hadn’t even found anyone who had the slightest clue where he might find Party Poison. 

He was tired and supplies were running low. He knew that if he wanted to continue this journey he would have to find some sort of civilisation to see if he could crash with them for a little while before he managed to get it backup and out in the zones again.

That’s when he spotted a rundown diner with a few bikes parked outside it. The bikes were covered in spray paint with different symbols all over them, and this meant only one thing in his mind, there were other killjoys here.

He let out a sigh of relief, although he still was a bit nervous. He hoped the people here hadn’t been ghosted while out hunting for supplies and that the bikes there were the only reminder left of them. He also hoped that if there really were people here that they would be kind enough to let him stay for a while or at least let him trade for some food and water. 

He parked the Trans Am at the front of the building before going up to the door and knocking three times. There was no red cross on the door which meant It hadn’t been invaded by Dracs recently.

The door opened to reveal a girl. She had black Curly Hair with a red streak running through it. One of her eyes was Brown, the other Green. She also had a thin scar running through the right one. Her fingers were wrapped around the handle of a ray gun, which she had aimed directly into Franks face. 

From inside the house he could see at least 6 other killjoys, lazing around the diner. 

“What’s your business here?” She asked. 

“Please. I’m running low on supplies, and I’m looking for someone. If I could crash here for a little, or just trade some supplies I would really appreciate it.”

She sighed. “And you promise you won’t harm anyone within this facility?” She asked. 

“I swear down, I won’t harm anyone. I’m just lost.” He said. 

“Fine, what’s your name?” She asked. 

“I’m Fun Ghoul.”

“Come on in Fun Ghoul. I’m Danger Apparition, and that there is Nitrogen Halo she said, gesturing to a girl with flaming orange hair who was sat down at what was once a table, drinking. 

“Thank you.” He said, before turning and walking over to a stool. 

The more he looked around, the more he noticed. This place seemed to be crawling with Killjoys. Everywhere he looked there would be more and more. 

He was so distracted by this that he didn’t notice a figure sitting down next to him. 

“Hey, Do I know you?” The person asked, which caused Frank to turn around and look at him. 

He had lots of hair. And a slightly wide nose. Recognition passed through Franks brain. 

“Oh my Destroya, you’re Jet star!!” He exclaimed. 

“Got it in one, but you still didn’t answer my question.” He smirked. 

“Oh I’m sorry.” Frank paused. “No, I don’t believe we’ve met before. I only knew about you through the posters that had been put up warning us of you guys throughout Battery City.”

“Sorry, it’s just your face is so familiar, it’s like I’ve seen it millions of times before.” He shook his head. 

“Anyway, I didn’t catch your name.” He said. 

“Oh! My names Fun Ghoul, I’ve only been in the zones for about a month or two so I’m still relatively new around here.” He said. 

“Well what caused you to stop off here?” He asked. 

“I’ve been looking for someone. My hearts been looking for a long while, but it took my brain a bit longer to catch up.” He said, before continuing, “anyway, I’ve been running low on supplies, so I asked if I could crash here for the night, she told me I could, he said, gesturing to Danger Apparition. 

“Cool. Me and my crew are also crashing here for a while. Kobra got shot in the leg by a Drac barely a zone ago, so we are waiting for his leg to heal. It’s nearly better so we should be leaving within the next few days, it’s never good to stay in one place too long, leaves you more vulnerable to Drac attacks if you ask me.” He said. 

He was still talking, but Franks brain seemed to have frozen. He was with Kobra, Of course he was he was part of the Fabulous Killjoys. 

If he was with Kobra, that means that Party Poison wasn’t far behind. 

Hope ran through his veins, but he was pulled out his thoughts by Jet star saying something else. 

“Are you sure we haven’t met, your face is so familiar!” He exclaimed. 

“Positive.” Frank said, although he was starting to feel a bit sick. 

“He dude, you don’t look so shiny, are you ok?” Jet asked. 

“Are you here with Party Poison?!” He blurted out.

“Err.. yes I am actually, why?” He questioned. 

“I really need to speak to him.” He said, his heart beating faster with each second.

“Sure… come with me…” he said, although there appeared to be a hint of scepticism in his voice. 

He led Frank around the counter, past a few drunken Killjoys and into a back room. 

“Party! There’s someone here to see you.” Jet shouted. 

“Who?” A voice which made Franks heart become restless, and his breath hitch in his throat shouted back. 

“Not sure, said they wanted to talk to you, goes by the name of Fun Ghoul.”

“I’ll be out in a minute.” He replied. 

Franks heart was beating so fast at this point he was sure it would explode. 

“Are you sure you’re feeling alright, you look slightly sickly…?” He said. 

“Yep! I’m fine!” He sqeaked. 

“If you say so.” 

A few seconds later Party rounded the corner. 

It was as if time stopped for Frank, and all he could focus on was the redness of his hair, his blue leather jacket. 

Gerard stopped walking and stared at Frank, and Frank saw confusion and curiosity leave his eyes, and be replaced with recognition, sadness, and love. 

They were stood at opposite ends of the hallway, but it felt like they were right next to each other. 

“F..Frankie….?” Gerard said, his voice sounding fragmented and lost, like the pieces of broken glass that had rained down from his window. 

Frank just nodded, unsure if he would be able to say anything without crying. 

“Oh my Destroya... Frankie?!” He said again, before running over and pulling him into a bone crushing hug. 

“I remember you Gee. I’m sorry I ever forgot you, I’m so sorry. I’m sorry.” He apologised over and over, letting the tears flow freely down his face. By this point his legs had given way, and so had Gerard’s, and they were both a crying mess on the floor of the diner. “I promised you I’d never forget you. But I did. I didn’t mean to but I did. And I’m so sorry Gerard.” He said again, before sobbing into his shoulder. 

“Hush, don't apologise Frankie. You remembered in the end didn’t you? And that’s all that matters.” He said into Franks ear, rubbing circles on his back in order to comfort him. 

“Err… I’ll just.. go check on Kobra than shall I?” Jet asked, but he was paid no attention by the two people kneeling and crying on the floor. He decided to make his exit and left the room to make sure Mikey was ok, while trying not to disturb either Frank or Gerard, although it would be pretty hard to disturb them anyway, considering how focused they were on each other. 

“I found you. I can’t believe I finally found you. I was beginning to lose hope, the zones are so big, and even though Pony and Doctor D said you would be in zone 7, it still took me a few days. It was a complete accident I found you. But I’m so glad I did.”

“I didn’t know where you were. I didn’t know if you were still in the city, taking your pills and numbing your mind each day just like the rest of them. I wondered if you had managed to escape, or if you had tried to but had been shot down by Korse and his Draculoids.” Gerard said, still crying. 

“But it’s ok now. I’ll tell you all about it later, but for now, please just hold me. Let me know you’re really there, Alive and real, and not just some cruel dream I’m having.” He said desperately. 

And with that Gerard clutched him closer and tighter, if that was even possible. 

“I’m sorry. I’m so sor-“ he was cut off by a pair of lips crashing into his. He kissed back almost instantly, and pushed his hands through Gerard’s hair. 

This was the most alive Frank had ever felt, hands entwined through strands of red, a tear soaked face, and a pair of lips on his. He had so many emotions running through his body that he barely had time to sort through them. There was passion, love, Joy, and also the feeling of being content. 

Eventually they broke apart, and Gerard smiled softly down at him through glossy eyes. 

“It’s ok Frankie. I’m here now. I won’t ever leave you again.” He said. 

. . . . .

A few days later. Gerard, Frank, Ray And Mikey were all sitting down at a table. They had just finished exchanging stories. Gerard told him that it was Mikey who got him to stop taking the pills in the first place, and that they had escaped the city the day after Frank had broken down in Gerard’s arms. 

That was where they met Ray. 

They had been out in the zones longer than Frank had anyway, that was the main message Frank managed to gather from that conversation. 

“You guys want more drinks? Gerard asked. 

A chorus of Yeah, and sure, went around their small group. 

“Ok but Mikey you’re coming with me to help carry the glasses back with me.”

Mikey groaned but moved to get out of his seat anyway. 

“Remember I asked you if I knew you?” Ray asked Frank, when Gerard and Mikey had left to go find some more drinks. 

“Yeah and I said no because I knew I hadn’t met you in person before.” Frank replied. 

“Well I just remembered where I recognised you from.” He said. 

“Where?”

“Well, back when I first started travelling with Poison and Kobra, Poison was still a little unstable from the pills. He had been taking a higher dosage than anyone else here, so it had a bigger effect on him.” He paused for a second. “While he was still going through withdrawal, he used to draw a lot, with scraps of paper and old broken crayons or bits of charcoal or graphite he found.” He paused again. “He used to draw one face in particular though, he always spoke about this face so sadly, and he always sounded so lost when he spoke about it.”

“Go on…” Frank said. 

“That face was you Frank. He loves you, what we thought were symptoms of the pills were actually symptoms of heartbreak. He thought you would never remember him, thought the pills had damaged you beyond repair. That moment in the diner when he said your name, it all came back to me.”

“I’m so glad you found him Frank. He was so lost for such a long time. He seems a lot better now. I think you helped.”

“I missed him two you know? As I said before, I thought he was dead, and I was so worried and shocked that in my one futile attempt at forgetting I swallowed the pills, and forgot everything.” Frank paused for a second. “I truly am sorry. I never meant to be this long.”

“It’s ok. He forgives you.” Ray smiled. 

“I’m glad.”

Just then Gerard and Mikey sat down at the table again, a few glasses in hand, laughing about some inside joke they shared. 

“What you gossiping about?” Gerard asked Frank and Ray, through giggles. 

“How shit the alcohol here is. Seriously, it tastes like sandpaper, the stuff we used to have tasted so much better I’m sure.” Ray said, shooting Frank a knowing smile, before turning his attention toward Gerard. 

“You have a point. I can’t really remember a lot about back then. It keeps coming back to me in pieces, some parts of my memory are still fuzzy, but it will come back eventually.” Gerard said, and while he was talking he had managed to snake an arm around Frank and pulled him closer. 

Frank leant into the warmth of the redhead, and smiled up at him. 

Gerard smiled back down at him before pressing a chaste kiss against his lips, and going back to talk to Ray. 

And for the first time in a very long time, Frank could finally say, he really and truly was happy.

**Author's Note:**

> I never meant for this fic to be this long like wow. 
> 
> I told myself it would probably be about 2000 words but NoPe. Lack of sleep and 10000 words later here we are. 
> 
> It hasn’t been edited so there probably will be a few mistakes. I’ll go back and edit it at some point. 
> 
> Hope you enjoyed and if you did please leave kudos or a comment, it would make my day.


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